Sunday, October 30, 2011

Autism vs. Neesha: The Incredible Hulk rises again

I think Friday night ranks as one of the top 10 worst nights of my life. It even beats the day my skirt fell down after an aggressive pat down  I received at the airport in Trinidad. I flashed half of Piarco International Airport with my most private ASSet.

Friday was yet another autism vs. Neesha battle, and it stained a beautiful day like grape juice on a white T-shirt. My poor sweet child. He didn't ask to be this way. I love him. Sooo very, very much. I tear up as I write this. My handsome 13-year-old young man. He has a smile that could out outshine the sun and a laugh that's more contagious than chicken pox.

His Friday night episode happened just before midnight. I guess I semi-blame myself because I should have put him to bed at his normal time instead of trying to be "cool mommy" and let him stay up late to celebrate the glorious weekend and no school. *sigh*

This meltdown gave a new meaning to the phrase "hole in the wall," which normally describes a trashy venue. Now it literally means "hole in the wall" of his bedroom as he flailed his legs and kicked a heel-sized hole in the wall while simultaneously doing some supersonic screaming that threatened to pop my eardrums. It all started after I said these horrifying words - "Hey pumpkin, time to brush your teeth and get ready for bed." I won't give you all the gory details, but the whole thing lasted about an hour-and-a-half. This time, I was saved by his dad coming and taking him for a drive.

When I was a kiddo, I was a mega fan of The Incredible Hulk series. I was fascinated at how one little thing triggered this nice man's transformation into a destructive monster! If you're familiar with this show, then understand that this is how it happens with my kiddo. ONE simple thing will piss him off, and sometimes you don't even know what that thing was! And then it's a path of destruction until the Hulk's rage eases off slowly and he finds himself sitting in silence, remorseful about what just occurred and sorrowful that he cannot control it.

I think the terrifying fiasco even scared Optimus Prime, who also resides in his room. Optimus looked a bit shaken. But I assured him everything would be OK as soon as the Hulk's tantrum blew over.

While he's having a meltdown, he's not himself, just a monstrous replica of his true self. His skin and limbs feel like steel because he tenses up so much and gets so powerful. A thousand tears later (for both of us) he winds down and sits there mumbling, usually about what just happened. Eventually, I get my sweet, loving kiddo back.

He's now getting some help from a professional behavior analyst, and we're trying out new strategies in dealing with him that will hopefully help him feel better and have a more structured existence.

In the meantime, I heavily rely on prayer, good friends, kind words, a loving husband and chocolate Frosties from Wendy's to help me hold on to my sanity!

Thanks for reading!

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  1. I'm hanging on to both those tactics for dear life. :)

  2. Glad you actually got a little break this time!

  3. Thanks, Alana! I had to learn how to recognize AND appreciate the small moments of peace I have in between all the madness.