Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Laziness is bliss

I was a single mom for 10 years, so I know what sacrifice means. But I also know another form of sacrifice. The kind that falls upon you when you're too lazy to do something and would rather do without it than make the effort. What? You need an example? Fine, but only because it doesn't require me to get up. I'll just unlock my brain for a while and let you into my lazy cortex ...

Sometimes I sacrifice watching TV if the remote control is more than four inches out of my reach.

Wash the last remaining spoon in the sink? Meh! I'll do it later; I'm pretty wiped out from washing the other two spoons. (This one reminds me of a hilarious video my son showed me some years ago. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PONvX6LmAPo )

I may pass out from exhaustion if I walk all the way to the closet to hang this one shirt. I'll just toss it over the closet door for now.

The cell phone battery and my gas tank, I view with a similar logic. If it's at least half full, it can wait another day. I mean, should I get up off my cozy bed to walk five steps in the direction of my phone charger? *looks at phone and sees it's half charged* Nah! I'll do it later.

Making a call takes so much energy. I hate sitting on hold, and I really don't feel like moving my lips to speak. And if I call, that means I'll have to "listen," which is even more work. I'll just call later, or maybe I can email them instead (even though the response is days rather than instant in some cases.)! That way, I don't have to make the call OR listen. Yea, that's what I'll do!

*sends email and never gets a reply ... ends up having to call*

I must say that checking voice mail is such hard work. You have to push all these buttons, then listen, then decide on the spot whether or not you want to save or delete. I mean, decision-making is yet another form of work. What if I don't know what I wanna do with the message right now? 

I really need to write something down, but the closest pen is like way over there on the dresser. I'll just try to remember it. *completely forgets it in two minutes*

I don't feel like cooking ... *looks in freezer for something to toss in the oven* At least I'm helping to keep microwaves and stoves out of the unemployment line!

One thing that sucks is when you have to actually snail mail something. This requires a walk all the way to the mailbox at the front of the house. Who has time to walk down their driveway?

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